If you're like most people who have encountered the idea of holiness, either in passing or in studying, your immediate inclination is to assume it has something to do with rules. Doing certain things or not doing certain things. If you're one of those people, you may wonder why I am choosing to start this blog with a post entitled "Seeking the Face of God" which doesn't really have anything to do with rules and standards of conduct. Well, that's precisely why I'm starting here.
Holiness isn't about rules. It's not about what we do or don't do. It is possible only within the realm of divine freedom, and rules have no place there.
We'll go more deeply into this concept at a later date, but we need to start somewhere, and seeking the FACE of God is all of holiness for humanity. You cannot acquire holiness. You cannot "do" holiness. It isn't about you. There isn't a multi-step process to becoming holy. There is only God. Only.
Those who have children tell me that their children come to them for many reasons. A lot of the time, children seek out their parents because of something they want. But the times that make parents go all gushy inside are those moments when their children seek them out just to be near them. To crawl up in daddy's lap while he's reading. To touch mommy's face or hair. To give sticky kisses and artless smiles. There's something basic about it. I came to find you, just to find you. Just to be near you. I love you.
When we seek God out in that way, when we just want to be near Him, not because of what He gives or can do for us, we are following a very basic urge that's built into us in the very heart of who we are. We are choosing to be near a Holy God. We are choosing holiness. Choosing holiness over, well, everything else. We could be out "doing," but we're not. We're just being near to the One who makes us holy, Who draws us onto His lap and holds us close.
This is why the imposed ideas of Daily Devotions, Appointments With God, Praying Before Meals, and the like are a little rankling. These things are most often things we do because someone said we should. It's an opportunity for someone more sanctimonious than I to cast judgment upon me and feel better about himself. "Oh, you AREN'T reading the current [insert popular daily devotional that I've never heard of here]? Well, I ALWAYS start MY day that way." You can almost hear him looking down his nose at me.
Now, don't get me wrong. I don't believe that reading your Bible daily, setting aside time for God, or thanking God for His provision are bad things to do. What rankles me is when people substitute activities for an actual growing, vital relationship with God. The only thing that unrankles me is the laughability of it, and then the sobering realization that they choose the facade over drawing close to the God who loves them. And the thing that drives me to my knees is the fact that many of the people who make this choice are the ones that other spiritual infants look up to as leaders. It's terrifying.
If you've ever spent time with an old, battle-tested, spiritually-mature Christian, there are some things you'll notice about them. These things won't be obvious, but they'll be there. You'll notice that this type of person doesn't talk about fads. He doesn't make much of his disciplines (though they're there). He doesn't generally tell you what he thinks. He does listen. He takes it seriously when you ask him to pray for something, and will probably ask clarifying questions so he understands the need. When asked for input or advice, sometimes he'll request time to give it careful consideration and prayer, and sometimes, because of his depth of knowledge of the Scripture and because of the instantaneous leading of the Holy Spirit, he'll simply answer. He won't put a lot of stock in what's popular, because he's more interested in God's view. He won't waste a lot of time on things that aren't spiritually edifying. He would rather be with God than pretty much anything or anyone else.
If you ever have the opportunity to know someone like this, do whatever you can to spend time with him/her. Ask questions, and then shut up. Listen intently to the answers. Learn all you can. People who are wise and have wisdom that should be shared most often will wait to have it drawn out of them. Wise people don't impose their wisdom. They know that only those who are seeking it will be receptive to it. Learn to be receptive. Learn to turn off your emotional attachment to your own opinions so that you can hear truth over the sound of your screaming self.
Spiritually mature people understand that there's a big difference between seeking God's face and seeking His hand. Spiritually mature people tend to not put all that much importance on physical needs, because they take very literally the words of Christ when He said that God knows you have need of all these things. Spiritually mature people tend to pray for spiritual things. They live in the Spirit. They understand what Jesus meant when He said, "God is spirit, so those who worship Him must worship in spirit and in truth." (John 4:24)
Here's where the rubber meets the road. Most of the Christians I've known throughout my life, and the vast majority of those I know now, seek God. But, they seek His hand, not his Face. They want the benefits of being "good with the Man" but they don't actually care all that much about knowing His heart. They want Him to bless them, but they don't really know or understand what that means. Often, they think that blessing relates to having an easy, happy life and that all their circumstances will be just peachy. (It doesn't mean that, by the way. Post for another day.) They use prayer as the barrel of a gun, demanding that God interfere, that He give, that He do something for them, and then they dare to throw trite phrases at Him, sometimes from Scripture, out of context, most of the time, which they think prove to God that He's required to follow their orders. This kind of prayer is unholy, just to be clear. Lord, forgive us, please.
But, there are a few, a very slim few chosen, who seek God's face. They want to know His heart. They want to live His way. They want their opinions to only be His opinions. They surrender their wills, their emotions, their ways of "doing life" (as a pastor of mine puts it). This kind of person doesn't want to tell God what she's doing and then wrangle Him into blessing her efforts. She seeks out where God's working and humbly asks to be a participant. She doesn't desire anything for herself, but rather begs God to allow her to pour herself into Him. She prays with all of her soul for those she loves, but she focuses on their hearts, their minds, their spiritual well-being. She doesn't say things like, "God make little Johnny's nose stop running, because he wipes it on his sleeve and I'm running out of laundry detergent." She prays with fervor and sometimes tears, "Lord, this child that You love is a sinner. Have mercy on him. Draw him close to your heart. Make his desire always and only to know you better."
So you know. This is where I stand. This is the type of person that I choose to be. I'm not holy. Only God is holy. But I choose holiness. I choose to seek His face.
Lord, draw me ever closer to your heart. Open my eyes to the REAL things that are unseen and take away my blindness which causes me only to see this human plane. Help me to forsake my physical desires and want You only, always, ever. Help me to choose holiness.
Blessings.
L~
